Michael (59) was sensitive to PrEP side effects

'Because of all of the side effects, I didn’t feel like having sex at all anymore.'

Michael (59) wants to use PrEP, but it turns out he is too sensitive to the side effects. “Finally there is a good prophylactic on the market, and it turns out I can’t tolerate the side effects. That really sucks.”

About two years ago, I applied for PrEP at the GGD (public health service). Before that, when I was in a serious relationship and we had eventually decided to have sex without a condom, it was like night and day. Maybe that was because I am getting older, because when I was younger I didn’t notice the difference as much. Or maybe it is just in my head, I really don’t know.

When I heard about PrEP, I thought: this could be the Holy Grail. At the time PrEP was €100 for thirty for a generic kind. I ended up having every side effect in the book: gas, reflux, my stools were different. After a while, I also started to get severe joint aches, headaches, insomnia, intense dreams, shortness of breath and even heart problems.

No libido

I went back to the GGD and they were surprised at the kind of side effects I described. I was asked to report them to the Side Effects Centre Lareb. Because of all of the side effects, I didn’t feel like having sex at all anymore, so in that sense, it really did protect me, haha. When you are a bottom but have non-stop diarrhea, it is not a very good combination.

It took about three months for all the side effects to go away completely. That made me wonder whether I should try PrEP again, this time a different generic brand. But when I met someone I liked, I decided to try it again anyways. The side effects came back, even quicker than the last time. On a chat site I was talking to someone who also used PrEP and he was taking yet another generic brand. I asked him if he had problems with side effects but he said he it wasn’t that bad. So I tried that kind but it wasn’t any better.

HIV medication

I don’t know if the active ingredients make me so sick, or if it’s the excipients. I really hope it’s the latter. This problem has made me worry about HIV even more. If I ever did get HIV, would I be able to take the HIV medication, or would it give me serious side effects like I’d been having from PrEP?

None of the boyfriends I had when I was about 18 are around anymore. In those days there were no drugs for HIV. I was lucky to be in a monogamous relationship from age 21 to 36, or I might not be here either. Now that there is a good prophylactic on the market and I can’t even take it They really sucks.

I’m thinking of trying the non-generic kind of PrEP. It costs about €800 for thirty pills, but if I can take it without getting side effects, it would be great.

Editor’s note

Men to Men regularly interviews men about how they protect themselves against HIV and STIs as well as their experiences with sex. We believe it is important for people to be well-informed and are able to make informed decisions on how to protect themselves. We hope that the variety of personal stories of people’s experiences help them with this. They do not necessarily reflect Men to Men’s standpoint. This story was published on Winq.nl.

We used a stock photo for this story as Michael wished to remain anonymous.

Text: Martijn Tulp
Stock photo: 123rf.com

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